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Showing posts from 2015

How to stay in balance

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Dear Bloggers,
The happiness season is on our doorstep again and this will be the second Christmas with my spouse who is suffering from PTSD. Our family is dealing with the situation and our eldest daughter is together with me the ones that give informal care. I have had a couple of comments come to me about “balance”, and a few made me realize that there is more to talk about regarding this subject.
First of all I have to add my note here…I am not a doctor of any sort or in any medical field, the information I bring to you is based on our personal experiences, opinions, and what we have learned along the way in this life journey. I am simply a spouse and a caregiver of one with PTSD, anxiety and panic attacks and other medical conditions… that brings awareness and support to others through our personal lives.

Balance is a word that I want to use a lot. Okay, more than a lot, more like all of the time, it’s extremely important to me and more than just a word, it’s a part of life. It’s a…

When days get shorter and nights colder

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Dear Bloggers,

Summer has ebbed away, leaving her ghosts flirting with memories, occasional warm episodes all too soon laid to rest by gales ripping up the Dutch coastline. Even though the temperatures are to high for the time of the year. 


It is hard to predict the weather from one day to the next, but the night cannot lie, nor masquerade as if it was still September with flat dark blue seas and smooth sailings. Although the evenings are getting chilly and I start up my wood fire and make it cosy with some candlelight.


It reminds me of my youth in the little village of Langweer were the summertime is hard work for a lot and at the end of October winter’s slumber will soon begin again. Slowly but surely the nights are drawing in…



The past few weeks have presented a chance for solving the more pressing physical problems that inevitably are the result from running a rough sailor's life. This is perhaps the biggest challenge for those who choose this life and how blissful though it may b…

What if you cam't figure out what your dream is

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Dear Bloggers,
I have to make a lot of decisions at the moment and find hardly any time to follow my dreams. And I think it’s a lot less about “What if” and more about “Why don’t I know what my dream is?” and probably more importantly “Where can I find my dream?“.

If you don’t have a dream and don’t care about not having a dream – well then you probably aren’t reading this anyway. If you don’t have a dream and you do wish you had one. Then I believe that wish for a dreamis actually a sign that you do have a dream… it’s just buried under some other stuff right now.


I’m going to share some possible scenarios of what could be happening here and some ideas for what to do with them: Scenario 1: You know what your dream is, but you are scared to admit it to yourself or to others. This is completely understandable! Having a dream is scary. Having a dream and going after it means everything in tour life could change. Having a dream and going after it means taking big risks. By not admitting that …

When your boss is wanting to destroy you.

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Dear Bloggers,
Imagine the scenario - a woman goes into work one day and her manager acts in an abusive and malicious way towards her. This is so shocking that she spends the next three years suffering from the consequences of that incident. She cannot sleep at night, she has frequent flashbacks and nightmares, she turns into a different person. The way she has been treated by her colleagues at work creates an ongoing condition that requires serious psychiatric support. If she would not have done anything but she knocked on every door that she could find to ask for help but no one reached out to stop this mentally disturbed manager who did everything in his power to destroy her mentally.
Is it right to talk about this as a complex post traumatic stress disorder (Severe PTSD)?



I compare to a dog. This dog was good and it was loyal and if something might be wrong it would bark for a while to be heard. If it looks like a dog, if it barks like a dog, and if overall it behaves like a dog, the…